


How to Keep You Close

by Yifera



Series: Angels love dimples [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, First Kiss, Fluff, Holding Hands, Hugs, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-01-10
Packaged: 2019-03-02 22:35:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13327803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yifera/pseuds/Yifera
Summary: Prolonged physical contact, holding hands, hugs, kisses...These were all human actions Castiel had experienced before, but the possibility of doing them on a regular basis had never crossed his mind.Until Sam, that is.





	How to Keep You Close

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sequel of "Smile Me Some Love" so if you want to know how this two 'got together' read that one first. Still, I think you can read this one as a stand-alone! I leave the choice to you! 
> 
> This wouldn't exist if upon reading "Smile Me Some Love" my best friend hadn't cried out "WHERE'S THE KISS? WHERE'S THE FUCKING KISS?". So, thank her. Here's your kiss and a bunch of other stuff, I do it all for you, bitch.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!

 

Castiel had been observing couples ever since he had confessed his feelings to Sam.

He hadn’t lied when he had agreed he didn’t want to start a romantic relationship right away, but basically this was because he had never stopped to figure out what entailed being in one. He wanted to understand more, to see what people did in this age and time to express their love to each other. And in time, maybe start doing these same things with Sam. If Sam was alright with it of course.

The centuries of stories and fiction that Metatron had overfed his brain with were helpful with supplying a colorful variety of romantic relationships, but he knew entertainment media's purpose wasn't in most cases to be truthful, so watching the people around him was a much better source.

Sam usually snickered and told him to be careful when he caught Castiel staring at random people, he could get in trouble he said, but how else was Castiel supposed to learn what he could do to show his affections towards Sam remained unchanged? As far as he knew, giving a proper maintenance to relationships was a very important matter, to keep them healthy… or so he had read from various websites.

But Sam also frequently told him to not believe everything the internet said so maybe he was wrong.

Entertainment media was subjective, staring at couples was considered socially rude and the internet was not to be trusted... No wonder Castiel took so much time to figure human things out.

In any case, if there was something all three of his sources seemed to agree with was that physical touch was one of the favorite ways of humanity to show love, at least in western culture. The internet in particular seemed to be especially intense about this subject.

Well Castiel was not very familiar with maintaining physical contact, not on a daily basis at least, but he was willing to try.

Castiel decided to start by keeping himself close to Sam, bumping shoulders when they stood side to side or sliding a bit further when they were in a booth so the flank of their thighs touched.

It didn’t did much for Castiel but Sam seemed to like it, his expression softened even if only for a moment, and sometimes he even leaned a little into Castiel. It was usually a good way to make Sam smile too.

When Castiel finally settled into doing this and it felt almost natural to him, he found he didn’t mind the idea of trying to do other things he had read. Like touching Sam’s face or hair, holding his hand in his –which apparently held an abysmal difference to a handshake–, hugging him, kissing him… to name a few.

All of them though –specially that last one– were gestures that seemed to be strictly associated to the start of a romantic relationship, and even if Castiel had been periodically warming up to the idea he didn’t know if this was the same for Sam. After all, when this had started the man had implied very directly that his past relationships made him doubt he was capable of forming a new one.

For the moment, Castiel decided to limit himself to hugging, which he knew was something friends usually did.

Maybe not out of the middle of nowhere though.

 

.

 

“Cas?” Sam’s arms hovered in the air at his sides for a moment before he gingerly wrapped them around Castiel’s back. “Is everything alright?” There was a smile in Sam’s voice but also confusion.

Castiel hadn’t thought about coming up with an excuse, he hadn’t realized he might need one.

He looked up from Sam’s shoulder. “Yes. Everything is fine.”

This second stage of his plan was turning out to be way more complicated than he had anticipated… the action to hug Sam per se wasn’t though, that felt way too good. Reluctantly Castiel stepped back.

“I apologize if that was out of place, I had no real reason to hug you... I suppose I just felt like it.”

Apparently that’s all that was needed to know as Sam let out a strangled noise from his throat and proceeded to pull him back into his arms, hugging Castiel fully and refusing to let him go until Dean stepped into the kitchen and loudly whistled at them.

 

.

 

There were a lot of hugs after that too and Castiel felt way happier at the continuous growth of physical contact between them.

If that felt good, it only made sense to think that trying more would make it even better. So only a few days later Castiel’s mind started to wonder about the other things he had read.

Sam did one of them before he could figure out if it was okay to initiate it himself.

 

.

 

Castiel grunted, lying back between the rests of concrete of the crumbled wall. He didn’t need much force to lift and push away the lifeless body of the angel that had been trying to stab him only mere seconds ago. It would never be easy to kill one of his kind, but this sister of his had been particularly nasty, at the moment he was just glad that he had been able to raise his blade in time.

He heard hurried steps coming his way and a familiar voice calling him as he got up to his feet, and suddenly Sam was right there in front of him, supporting half of his weight. He started informing Castiel about the perimeter in a steady voice but his wide hazel eyes and hands only seemed worried to check if Castiel’s vessel was unharmed. 

A frown appeared on Sam’s face after a few seconds and his hand surged upwards, he gently tilted Castiel’s head to inspect the side of his face. Castiel understood right away. His sister had managed to make a deep cut with her blade that slashed from the lobe of his ear all the way through his cheekbone. 

Castiel could feel a tiny trail of grace escaping through it. The wound was probably shining bright blue.

“It is merely a scratch, Sam.” He said, his voice was rough from the dust he had breathed, he coughed slightly. “It will heal in time.” Healing it with grace would only make him waste more of it and it shouldn’t take more than a few hours to close anyway.

Sam nodded after a moment but didn’t remove his hand from Castiel’s face, nor did his eyes left the cut. Castiel could feel the anxiety and repressed fear in the way the man tightened his lips and swallowed. Sam’s eyes only locked with his again when Castiel rose his own hand to touch his face, Castiel managed a little smile.

“Focus, Winchester.” He brushed a strand of hair away from Sam’s face and turned serious. “We still have to find Dean.”

They finished the hunt without any more surprises as they got Dean, cleaned up their mess and burned the bodies. Still, Sam wouldn’t stop himself from reaching out for Castiel’s cheek from time to time to check the state of the cut.

That was how that gesture was promptly added to their shared physical touches.

 

.

 

Hold hands, Castiel did want to try that too.

That one was suggested by Dean.

 

.

 

“Dean, for the love of God, I am not letting you walk in there on your own!” Sam was trying very hard to not raise his voice but his anger was still present and clear.

“Come on, Sam! You know you have to watch out for the amazing little sensors or whatever was that stuff you had installed. And for that you have to stay here!” Dean said, not so softly. “And Cas has to stay so he can quickly zap to where I am in case you do see something with those same sensor thingies.” Dean then pointed at Castiel with a smirk, as if what he was going to say next had already made him win the argument. “Aaaand, that means Cas can zap to where I am at any moment if something happens to me. Come on! It’s a win-win strategy, Sam!”

Sam looked at him darkly for a moment before he muttered a curse under his breath and anxiously carded both hands through his hair. Castiel knew for a fact that Sam was perfectly aware of how a good of a strategy this was… but the world would stop spinning before Sam Winchester happily let his brother throw himself into danger on his own. And Dean knew that too. 

Eventually Dean sighed, scratching the back of his neck a little and approaching Sam to drop a hand to his shoulder.

“It’ll be fine, Sam. They’ll never even know I’m there.”

After a moment Sam raised his eyes. “No unnecessary risks. Promise me you’ll be quiet.”

Dean grinned. “As a cat.” He straightened himself up and turned to bump Castiel’s arm with his fist. “You make sure he doesn’t freak out. Hold his hand or something.”

Castiel patted Dean’s shoulder in return. “Good luck, Dean. And I’ll do that… if necessary.”

Dean chuckled and turned, as he went to open the door of the cabin he gave them one last look and a wink. “But no funny stuff you two, I would like to get out of this one alive.”

“Haha, hilarious, Dean.” Sam snapped back.

Dean ran off, leaving them alone with the soft buzz of the computer and the muffled noises of the night. Sam started fidgeting only six minutes in, alert but also completely tense.

Castiel had done the numbers, he knew for a fact Dean had at least another seven minutes before he could have any potentially dangerous encounters. So, he decided to be useful. Castiel pulled a chair that had seen better days, sat down at Sam’s side and reached out to take his hand. Sam flinched a little but he didn’t move away.

“You know I’m working a computer, right?” He said lowly, even when he was visibly relaxing at the touch, his eyes didn’t leave the screen. “I might need both hands.”

Castiel didn’t even blink. “I’ve seen you work. You are not going to need your left hand for at least five more minutes.”

Sam snorted, a little smirk playing at the corners of his lips. After a beat he turned his hand and laced their fingers together. “Smartass.”

 

.

 

For kissing, Castiel couldn’t delay it more, he had to ask Sam.

But he couldn’t help but do a little research first, just in case Sam was indeed willing to do it.

First kisses were a big deal apparently. A lot of sites agreed it was better to first kiss someone in a romantic setting. Most also pointed out that a private setting was preferable to a public one. A few approved that watching a film was romantic. There were films in this thing called Netflix.

So watching Netflix with Sam in the privacy his room should be romantic.

 

.

 

“Sam, I would like to ask you something.” Castiel managed to blurt out, somehow having stretched the moment so much they were already in the middle of the movie.

“Sure, Cas.” Sam said without too much of a thought, but when he realized Castiel wasn’t continuing he lowered the volume of his laptop and nudged Cas with his foot. “Shoot. What is it?”

“Kissing.”

The noise Sam let out made Castiel think he would have chocked if he had been eating. Hazel eyes turned to look at him fully, their almost cuddled positions feeling much closer when facing each other.

“Ah, um… what about it?” Sam was caught off guard, he tended to play dumb when he was.

Castiel felt a tingle of worry mixing with the already present anticipation. “I am… uncertain about it.”

Sam tilted his head and the way he completely paused the movie and turned his body made Castiel suspect he wasn’t pretending his confusion anymore.

“But… haven’t you done it before. With… Meg? April?”

Castiel nodded, turning too so he was cross legged and facing Sam. “Yes, but that’s not what I’m uncertain about.”

“Well… what is it then?” Sam looked genuinely curious now.

“It’s more about… consent.” Castiel ached to reach out and grab Sam’s hands, it didn’t seem appropriate though for what he was talking about so he just stared at his for a moment. “I know kissing is a very intimate action for humans and… that it can be intrusive if not given proper consent.”

Castiel risked a glance up, Sam was watching him with an unreadable expression… and he didn’t know what to do with that so he continued.

“Sam, I know that in counted occasions you have had… no control or saying over way worse intrusive acts to your body and your mind. And I want you to know that I won’t be mad if you don’t ever give me the consent to kiss you, either because of the past or because you don’t want to build this relationship between us any further… just know, Sam, that I still will be happy to be by your side.” He licked his lips, smiling a little. “I will still love you the same.”

This had been only the second time Castiel had said it and he decided he had to say it more. Sam was giving him the same exact look he had the first time and it was so open and vulnerable Castiel suddenly wanted his vessel to be twice as big so he could surround Sam completely and cocoon him in his arms.

“I…” Sam took a shaky breath in and then chuckled softly, looking away. “Damn, Cas, it’s just… it’s just a kiss…”

Castiel felt something flutter inside him, an exhilarating mix between expectation and hope. He had given Sam the possibility to turn him down, and Sam hadn’t taken it.

He swallowed and leaned in, trying to get Sam to look at him. “I thought first kisses were important.”

Sam snorted shortly, but Castiel could see he was starting to blush. “It only has the importance you give it.”

“Well…” Castiel finally gave in, taking Sam’s hands in his and feeling himself relax into the familiar contact. “I apologize, I think I may have already made it important.”

Sam finally looked back at him, his eyes were slightly shiny. “You always apologize for the weirdest things.”

“Shush, I’m learning.” Castiel smiled and raised a hand, brushing some stray strands out of Sam’s face. “Can I ask for consent to kiss you Sam Winchester?”

“You already have it.”

Sam almost didn’t finish the sentence before he leaned in and closed the distance between them, Castiel held on to Sam’s arms on an instinctive search for balance as warm lips finally pressed against his, firm and sweet.

Castiel only needed two seconds to know that kissing Sam was going to be on top of his priority list from now on.

At first glance you wouldn’t have said the kiss was passionate, it could even be considered chaste… but there was something vibrant in it, some desperation in the way Sam had initiated it, some repressed kind of hunger in the way he was trying to keep the kiss slow even when his hands frenetically reached out for Castiel and kept him close. A shudder ran through Castiel and he took it all in for a second before raising slightly into his knees and pushing forward into Sam’s space, somehow he managed not to break the kiss as he swallowed up Sam’s surprised gasp. Castiel let himself take another moment to enjoy how responsive the man turned to be to the way he took control, how Sam kissed back and repositioned himself as he held onto Castiel’s shirt.

He was perfect. So perfect.

Castiel took Sam’s face between his hands and tilted his head to deepen the kiss, hoping he was just as good at expressing his feelings as he tried to pour in it all the love he felt towards this incredible human being. Sam whimpered softly against him in return and Father didn’t that made Castiel tremble with a new kind of delight.

Starting to feel a little overwhelmed he forced himself to slow down, until with a last nip on Sam’s lips he finally pulled back slightly, pressing their foreheads together and breathing in deeply. Sam panted for air only inches away, his eyes were still closed and Castiel took that as an opportunity to steal a small peck from his lips, an action that rewarded him with a breathless chuckle.

“I hope that was satisfactory.” Castiel murmured, letting his hands travel back through Sam’s jaw and into his hair.

Sam opened his eyes and stared at him for a moment. Strong arms moved and surrounded Castiel’s waist, without a word Sam pulled him in until Castiel and no other choice but to fully sit on Sam’s lap.

Sam hummed, seemingly pleased with their new arrangement, even if he had to look up now. “More than you think.”

Sam only had to stretch a little and he was kissing Castiel again, this time full and demanding. Castiel responded in kind without hesitation.

When they managed to separate again, Sam was completely boneless under him, all half-lidded hazel eyes and dimpled smiles. Castiel disentangled a hand from brown locks to poke lightly at his cheek, he more than enjoyed the presence of those dimples.

“You know… you were right, the internet is not to be trusted. Though I have to admit some tips were helpful.”

“What?”

Castiel gestured to the abandoned laptop at the end of Sam’s bed.

“I didn’t really need a movie to kiss you.”

Sam dropped his head forward and buried his face in Castiel’s chest, his shaking laughter vibrated through the angel.

“God, I love you so much.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Leave your thoughts in the little box below, I love hearing what you think and each commet make writing 100000 times more joyful! Kudos are lovely too, of course.
> 
> Edit: I kinda made fanart for this!  
> [link](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13830726)
> 
> Have a nice day wherever you are!


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